Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Report from No Man's Land

I'm not sure how much I can say, for fear of this transmission being intercepted by the dreaded Wisconsinites. I will keep it brief.

The troop and I have made it safely to Mackinaw City, where we have holed up in a curious bunker called Best Western. The enemy has tried to flush us out by providing us with horrible "bar" soap, but the joke's on them. I brought liquid foamy soap of my own, so a gunky, rubbery rinse-off is not in the cards.

We made a recon tour of the island. It appears to be badly fortified, despite having its own fort. Insertion points include...pretty much anywhere. Beware of snakes, however. They will not hold still long enough for you to get a decent photo.

My troop and I are planning a push into the Northern Landmass today, although I cannot mention specifics. Details to follow.


  1. Wishing your troop well. Sounds just like one of those old reports, except for the neat new details. Very nice.

  2. The most dangerous enemy you will find there is Paratroop Fudge. They will leave tempting tidbits, and you will eat so many, that eventually you will begin to sink, and eventually disappear forever. The only defense I know, is a bike ride around the island for each pound of fudge you eat.

    (have a great time!)

  3. It's no fun when the snakes get jittery, form themselves into hoops and roll swiftly away. Do get photos of some native Michigan sticks for the collection.

  4. Yeah, the old days war was so much simpler. There were rules, like, you had to stand in a straight line, close together, and let the enemy shoot at you and then you got a crack at them. Also, it was understood that any invading force had to attack any available forts, no matter how inconveniently they might be placed. So it didn't really bother the military minds of the day that much if there were landing zones...everywhere. They knew the enemy would come to them. All they had to do was wait. Oh, for the good old days.


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